Video Transcription

How you can help someone who is suicidal

My name is Tanya, and I’m a telephone crisis supporter with Lifeline—I have been for about the last five years or so.

My name’s Kany. I work for Lifeline and have had a number of roles, including center supervisor.

My name is Megan, and I work for Lifeline.

There are so many reasons why people might consider suicide, and it can be really difficult for others to understand. Most people who are thinking of suicide don’t actually want to end their lives. Many consider suicide just to end the unbearable pain they’re going through, feeling like there’s no other option.

Often, when people are considering suicide, they give out clues and warnings. It’s really important that we are in tune with that and watch for it carefully. They may have had previous attempts to take their life. They may also display unusual behavior—like a change in their usual mood, being sadder than usual, or becoming more withdrawn.

A change in appearance, a shift in normal habits, mood swings, or talking or writing about suicide—even in a joking or lighthearted manner—are all things to watch out for. They may start giving away possessions or pets. They may also engage in more self-destructive or risk-taking behaviors.

Sometimes, when someone has been feeling low for a long time, they might suddenly seem better—content and happy. This can actually be a real danger period, as they may have accepted their decision to end their life.

We can all do something to prevent suicide. It’s really important to reach out and ask the question directly: “Are you thinking about suicide?” It can’t be ambiguous. The reason we ask this question is to show the person that we care—that this is not too horrible for us to confront together—and that we’re willing and open to the conversation about their thoughts of suicide.

Some things you can say to them include: “I might not really understand how you’re feeling, but I’m here for you. I care about you.” You don’t need to have all the answers. Just letting them know there is help available and that you can find it together is important. We want to remain calm, be non-judgmental, and reassure them that it’s okay to talk about this.

It’s also really important to assure the person at risk that there is hope, that there is help, and that they can have a future.

Avoid saying things like, “You’ve got so much to live for,” “It will all get better,” or “You’ll disappoint your family.” It’s important not to show shock, be judgmental, or minimize what they’re saying. Your role is to listen and be there for them. Often, the person will feel relieved just to have someone truly listen without judgment.

Most people who are feeling suicidal really do want to talk to someone, but taking that first step is difficult. It’s important that they have someone who will just listen.

If someone tells you they are having thoughts about suicide, you need to ensure their immediate safety. If they have the means to harm themselves—such as medication, drugs, or a rope—you need to help them remove those risks. If life is in imminent danger, call Triple Zero (000) urgently.

If someone tells you they’re thinking about ending their life, don’t keep it a secret. Work with them to find other supports. There are crisis lines such as the Suicide Callback Service, Lifeline, and Kids Helpline. Their local GP is also a great starting point and can help access longer-term care.

If you know or suspect that someone may be suicidal and showing some of these signs, I urge you to ask them to call Lifeline at 13 11 14.

Video by LifeLine