STORIES

Its not what you think

24th April, 2017   |    By Jacob   |    10 min read

life isn’t what you think, you need to look around and see yourself through another perspective, only then will you find out what your true purpose is…

Okay, let’s talk about something, the word ‘perfect’. A lot of people think that the word perfect is over used, mostly because of people saying simple things like something that someone likes is ‘perfect’ or saying someone they like is perfect and from the over use of it, so many people now believe that no one is perfect or that there is no such thing as perfection anyway. Well I am going to tell you other wise. Everyone is perfect. Everyone has a different perception of perfection, so some people may not see it, but I do. Everyone is still perfect. Just because one or two people don’t see how amazing you are, doesn’t mean you’re not perfect, because you are. Don’t believe anything else that anyone else says, because; You, Are, Perfect!

Every single one of you listening to me right now, you are not your bra size, nor are you the width of your waist, nor the slimness of your legs. You are not your hair colour, your skin colour or even a shade of lipstick you put on this morning. You are not the size of your muscles and your shoe size has no significance, you are not defined by the amount of attention you get from guys, girls, or any combination thereof. You are not the number of sit-ups or push-ups you can or cannot do, nor are you the number of calories in a day. You are not how thick your facial hair is, you are not the amount of hair on your legs or the nice dress or suit you bought the other day to wear to the ball. You are no mixture of these things.

You are the content of you as a person, you are the ambitions that drive you and you are the goals you set for yourself. You are the things you laugh at and the words you say, you are the thoughts you think and the things you wonder. You are beautiful and desirable not for the clothes you wear but for the spark of life within you that compels you to make your life a full and meaningful one. You are perfect not for the shape or size you are but for the soul you carry. You are perfect for the type of person of who you truly are.

The other day, a random person asked me why I smile so much; I replied to him without even thinking with this “because no matter what I’m going through, no matter how bad I feel about anything, there is always a reason to smile, there is always a reason to be happy.” See I know it may be hard to smile sometimes because it’s hard, you don’t understand and you don’t know if you are going to get through it. Sometimes you’ll go through storms in your life and you don’t know how long the storm will last for, but no matter how thick the rain gets, however strong the wind may be, know that there is a sunny place on the other side waiting to be discovered. No matter what you are feeling, no matter how bad things can get, know that the more you go into the darkness, the better the light will feel.

There are times in your life where you look in the mirror and think to yourself, well I can’t do this and I can’t do that and all you do is concentrate on the things that you wish you had or the things that you wish you didn’t have like depression or anxiety. So you completely forget what you do have, you won’t even know how good you have it. There will be a point in your life where you will stop and say why can’t I be happy? Why don’t people like me? I wish I were happy, I wish people liked me. Well you know what? Wishing won’t help! Wish all you want, nothing will ever happen, nothing will ever change if that’s all you do. Have the courage to go out into the world and grant your own wishes, instead of waiting for someone to come along to do it for you.

There are those of you right now, that your life, it’s not where you want it to be, you think you’ve messed up or you think you’re doing good but you can’t find a way to be great. So listen to what I am saying right now, just because you’ve failed doesn’t mean you are a failure! One thing most people don’t understand is that you are supposed to fail. You are supposed to fail! Failure is the pathway to success. Think of it like this, you come to a river and through the river are stepping-stones. These stones represent life. There are times that you will fail, you will fall into the river but if you don’t fail, if you don’t fall into the river, you can’t learn how to swim, you can’t become stronger than before. So it doesn’t matter how talented you are, it doesn’t matter how skilled you are, there are some times where things aren’t going to go right for you, anything that can happen, will happen, but you have to, you have to believe that when things are bad, you and only you, yourself can change them. When things don’t go your way, when you fail, when you fall, you and only you can figure out how to get back up. There will be people along the way trying to push you down and time after time again, they will succeed! But you need to understand that no matter what, there are going to be other people who will try to help you get back up, but for them to do that, you need to first help yourself. You and only you can figure out how you’re going to get back up. You must have faith, you must believe in yourself. You must believe in your own abilities, your own skills, you need to have faith in your own ways and ideas!

Be patient

So just be patient. I know being patient can be the hardest thing because there might not be anyone around you to hold your hand now, but when the time comes they won’t have to, there will be someone beside you to hold your heart. Also be thankful. It’s hard to be thankful; I know what it’s like to think you have nothing and to think, well what’s there to be thankful about? I’m not going to be able to do anything, I won’t get a good job, I won’t ever get married or have a life but you know what? It’s a lie to think you’re not good enough; it’s a lie to think that you are not worth anything; it is a lie to think you have no purpose because you do! Every person, every single one of you was put here for a reason you just need to find out what that reason is. Look around you; there are people everywhere that are willing to help, that are willing to love, that are willing to give you a chance. So open your eyes, everyone has at least one person they can talk to about problems, whether it be someone you don’t know that understands or your best friend that helps you through a few rough patches in your life, there is always someone there. So you don’t have to be scared anymore.

Most self-hate, self-harm, even bullying is caused by fear, the fear of losing people, and the fear of abandonment, the fear of not being good enough. Just simple things like that. There is a saying and it goes something like; Fear is not real, it is the product of thoughts you create. However, danger is very real but fear is a choice. This statement is one of the most meaningful things I have ever heard, because it’s true, there is no such thing as fear. It’s not real. Fear is a product of an emotion. It is just your subconscious telling your mind, you need to be scared, that the danger is going to control you. Well I am going to tell you that it can’t. Danger. Fear. It cannot control you. If you are scared, scared of loosing someone, scared of being alone, scared of not being accepted. If you are scared because you don’t know what you are going to do with your life, you feel like you have no ambitions, no worth, like no one will accept you for who you are. Don’t be scared. Don’t fear it. I know it’s hard; I have been in situations of where I don’t know what to do with myself either, but I got through it. I got through it because I realised, there is no such thing as fear. You can as well. Fear is nothing but the result of an emotion, the emotion of anger, and the emotion of sadness. It’s the result of pain. Fear is nothing, it’s not real, but if you let it control you, you’ll end up being scared of everything. So don’t let it control you.
Fear is a choice. We have a choice whether or not to let fear in. We have a choice whether or not to be scared. So don’t. I know sometimes it can be hard, the danger around us, it get too intense and we don’t know what to do. But never, ever give up fighting because you always have a chance.

It is scary to know how many people, not just girls but guys too, have eating disorders, it’s scary to know how many people are just angry at life because of their situation at home and angry or scared because of others, it’s scary to know how many people feel like they are worth nothing. It’s scary to know how many people feel like they have no purpose. Every single person, girl, boy, old, young, skinny, fat, white or black, I want you to know, that You, Are, Beautiful! You are gorgeous just the way you are. You, and I mean ALL of you, can over come any challenges and any bad or negative things that come into your life, you just need to find that new perspective of how to live, see yourself through somebody else’s eyes and you will find out just how amazing you truly are.

So just remember, be thankful, and dream big, anything can happen so never give up. Remember all of this and you will have the strength to concur anything that comes before you.

Jacob


Also check the related topics:  

Self esteem Self harm Bullying
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