Video Transcription
Thinking about ending your life
If you’ve been thinking about taking your life or know someone who is, seeking help can be tough, but it’s the best thing you can do. I did go through a suicidal phase at one stage and, with help from counselors and everything, I did manage to get through that. It was a tough time, but at the end of the day, the help was there, and it’s about being willing to actually accept that help.
Those moments when you just want to scream, those moments are when you think those thoughts: is life really worth living? You can change that, no matter what, no matter what happens. You can change that, and in those moments, I got really upset with myself, and I would always blame myself. But then I thought the only way I could actually get through anything was to love myself.
I couldn’t go out; I was so sad, stayed at home listening to the sad songs, music with the sad lyrics, and it started giving me the idea that I was done. You just get to a point where you stop thinking forward and start thinking backwards, and you just find yourself spiraling into this place where you start doubting yourself. Yeah, you’re not really sure what’s ahead, and you don’t really want to find out.
It’s really a great sign that you’re here looking at this content. That’s a really good sign that there is part of you that wants to live and that believes things could get better. Just thinking about moving forward, try to be strong. Make sure that you are thinking positive, not negative. Taking a step when you’re already feeling like your energy is down and your motivation might be low is really hard, and that’s a bit of a catch-22, as you need to push yourself a little bit right at the time when you don’t feel like your batteries are charged.
I suppose I found out that I had a passion for writing songs and music, so I decided to put most of my emotion into songs and art. At the end of the day, listening to guided meditation and things like that helped. It’s a time when you often feel very alone, so it’s really important to know that there are people around who are willing to listen, hear you out, and offer support to either get help or to help you understand what’s going on.
I just turned to those around me. I didn’t want to let it beat me, and just having chats with some supportive people in my life really helped. Some of them I didn’t even know very well. They want to hear what you’ve got to say, they want to listen to you, and they want to work with you to find those reasons for living and a path forward.
While it can feel like it’s too hard to go on and there’s no hope, remember that suicidal thoughts are just thoughts—you don’t need to act on them. It’s not uncommon to feel like there’s no point in going on, but it’s possible to work through it and feel in control again. Reachout.com provides practical tools and support to help get through everything, from everyday issues to tough times. Check it out for more info on mental health, peer support forums, and even apps to help you deal with stress and anxiety.
Video by Reach Out
