SUPPORT: How can I get an adult to best support me?

15th March, 2018    |    By  Project Rockit    |     1.9k

In Episode 5, we break down that old ‘talk to an adult’ line to hear from some different people about how to work with trusted adults to get the support you need. 1. Who is the person who has given you the best support ever and why? 2. What are the barriers that hold people back from reaching out for support from adults? What are people afraid of? 3. If you could teach adults one thing about how to give you support better, what would it be? Want more resources like these? Head to www.projectrockit.com.au/contact/ to stay in the loop! Produced by Momentum Studios Australia


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SUPPORT: How can I get an adult to best support me?

“Speak to an adult” is advice we’ve heard a million times before, but it’s not always that simple. We work with heaps of young people who tell us they don’t feel comfortable speaking to an adult because they’re worried they won’t understand, they’ll overreact, or they’ll get them in trouble for the thing that they’re seeking help for.

When I was at school, I felt like if I told a person that I trusted, like my mom, she would then rock up to school with a megaphone and shout it out to everyone—let them all know.

I remember that too, guys. We get it. Using adults as allies can be really helpful, but how do we make sure we get the support we’re actually looking for? Well, we asked some of our team members as well as the young people we work with how they have used adults in their lives as allies, and well, this is their advice:

So, when I’m seeking help, I try to go to someone who I’m super comfortable with, and someone who obviously won’t judge me for what I’m about to say. I will always go to someone that I already have that connection with and who has supported me in the past—who I know will support me through anything that I bring to the table.

First and foremost, I have to pick someone that I trust. Someone that, regardless of the situation, they’re gonna listen to me, they’re gonna be honest with me, and they’re not gonna judge.

For me, when it comes to adults, I feel like trust is kind of a subjective term, so what I do is I like adults that I vibe with. If we have the same energy, we’re on the same wavelength, then we have really good connecting energy, and then I’ll be able to confide in you.

The way I’ve approached an adult in my life for help in the past is by being brutally honest with them. I sat them down and told them, “I’ve got this problem, and I need your help.”

I love a good phone call or FaceTime session just because it means it’s in real time, and I can get the help that I need instantly.

When I last asked an adult for help, I was able to just approach them, and they were able to make a time for me. We were able to sit down and just talk about it.

How I approach adults is through social media. I’ll contact them or through emails or text messages, and I’ll just be like, “Hey,” and I’ll talk about what’s happening. Eventually, if I’m comfortable, we can talk in person about it.

I would approach someone again by how much I’ve known them for, and it’s really easy because that way they know how to help me and what’s been going on for me. They could just tell if I really need to talk about something.

The best way to support young people, in my opinion, is just to listen. Often people want to just talk and give their opinion, but sometimes people just want to let it out. They don’t necessarily mean specific advice; they just need someone to listen and be that place of solace for them.

Definitely try to keep an open mind and try your best not to judge. If you took away that judgment and the stigma about any topic, that young person could feel safe and happy to talk about anything.

An adult should have an open conversation. I would tell them to stay to understand, seek to understand our beliefs, our circumstances, our behaviors—because there’s always a reason why we do things.

So, whether you’re looking for support, advice, or just someone to listen to you, the right adult is out there. You just gotta find them, and if you feel like you can’t find them, we have linked some sites below that might be able to help you find the support you’re looking for.

Yeah, and as we always say, if you don’t find the help you need the first time, just keep looking. It is out there. You deserve it.

So, peace out, peer office.

Video by Project Rockit