Video Transcription

Courtney’s Story – Life as a young carer

My name is Courtney and I’m a carer of my mother who has multiple sclerosis.
I became a carer in about 2003 when I was 8 years old.
Whereas now I don’t really see it as a label, I see it as an aspect of my life, of my personality, because MS is so unpredictable, you never know what each day’s going to bring.
So some days mum might be extra tired, so I would pick up the slack and do triple the amount of work around the house or whether it’s online banking, paying bills, or remembering appointments.
Talking to other carers does help because they’re in similar situations, they have similar occurrences and things that happen at home.
Carers need that support because I think they are the main people that will not source it because they’re giving so much support to that person.
They often burn themselves out and they feel a bit overwhelmed.
They can, you know, get themselves into such a rut because they’re putting all their energy and focus onto this person and not on themselves.
So it’s really important that they do reach out and understand that there are resources and people out there that can help, give them that assistance, that guidance, and time off just so they can be themselves and recharge for a bit to then continue being the wonderful world that they’re really connecting to.
Services will certainly help you get through the rough times because without those services and resources, just knowing that they’re there, it does take that little bit of pressure off you.

I do find counselling to be a big, big help.
I’ve used it for many different things, from my mum’s illness and my parents’ divorce to just general school drama.
So it’s nice to have someone else in a safe space where you can go, “Hey, this is how I’m feeling,” get that off your chest so you can give the best care that you can to that person that you’re helping to look after.

Caring for my mum has enriched my life a lot.
It makes me a lot more patient, makes me a lot more loving, it makes me a lot more humble, and it makes me a lot more happier.
My relationship with my mum has always been very lovely, very caring, your normal mother-daughter dynamic, but because I’ve had to care for her and see her in a different light and her more vulnerable lines, and me having to take on the parental role, you just get a whole new appreciation and respect for that person that has to go through that.
But at the same time, it just brings you so much closer than you could ever imagine.
So I love her a bit. She’s the best.

Video by Carers Gateway